Touch …

Your warmth, your compassion, what was it that made my endless cries silent into peaceful dreams
The only means to tender laughter from my restless screams

The first time you held my fingers when your arms meant the world to me
The gentle kisses on my forehead that brought in my eyes the eternal glee

Oh now I don’t cry, neither do I scream
But still I seek your supportive pat which can make me believe in my dream
“Go Dada Go”, your confident whispers which were pre-requisites for me to ace in every race
Then you found “him” and left us all for viewing this world through “his” eye
The unstoppable droplets of moisture in your eyes, like a million twinkling stars in sky

And then you came back with a peck on my cheeks
And held in your loving arms your wandering, silly meek
My days began with your soft fingers in my hair and ended with your silken whispers in my ears
Oh how I still long for those golden years

Before I could realize you stood there
Like a tiny little hare
Pulling my trousers with your delicate fingers and asking me to guide
To overcame the scare of approaching tide
I knew you would again soon leave me chasing “him”
Yet again turning glittering world dim

Today I am an old, shrunk pine
But holding your wrinkled fingers in my hand
I know that my bed to eternal journey will be venerated by you no lesser than a shrine

Oh Lord, Thank Thee for sending “Her” in every form in every aspect of my life
Comforting, Relaxing, Loving, Caring and strengthening me in all my strife

End of an eventful decade !!!

For me Yr 2009 was not just end of 1 calendar yr but it kept boggling in my mind that it also brought to end 1 whole decade ...

I kept thinking of all the experiences, journey till date, people and places encountered, memories gathered from 1999

1 realization was the feeling of entering late 20's and going away from the "so called" youth demographics ...

Milestone of adding yet another degree, end of phase-2 of a wonderful student life (:sigh) ...

Learning of umpteen number of marriages and (unfortunately) missing most of them ...

Getting dreaded with warnings, signs & symbols and buck of tension passed on to from family with constant reminders saying "Now ur turn" ...

Facing and rising with great courage, hope, optimism, falana+thikana from so far the worst economic hit ...

Getting to enter the world of glam & glitter and all those "oh so petty and unworthy to publicise" kinda Tv appearances ....

So on and so forth ... However, more than all of the above obvious experiences a more subtle yet intense, profound experience was that of rediscovering myself in a different manner ....

A year making me open up more, making me more accepting of people around me and even more of myself, my desires, my inhibitions, to face the dreaded taboos with a feeling of confident liberty of "make my way" ...

Towards end of this year I could sense myself slowly and steadily getting transformed into a more calmer, hopeful, focussed, decisive, confident and confidante person ... I cud sense a drastic personality metamorphosis (with signs of it getting evident in fact from end of 2008 itself) ...

This feeling of being so comfortable in my skin and doing stuff coz I feel like caring a damn abt the social norms is indeed very soothing ...

No specific evidential references to elucidate the above discourse ... Some of my naughty readers wud have been relieved had I ended this post with an interesting confession on lines of "I dont mind proclaiming to the world tht I m a lesbian" !! but apologies for discouraging you all as my list doesnt have nething on those lines :) ...